Family · Fibromyalgia · Grief · Life changes · Relationships · Spirituality

Are you, your own worst enemy?

Welcome, come on in for a cuppa! As I write this it’s a beautiful autumn day here on the east coast of Australia.

We have some tiny finches flitting about in our Jacaranda tree chatting to each other, as we sit in my back garden with the sun shinning upon us.

You may notice my hubby is quietly busy with a project he’s working on, in front of the garage.

And we just heard the unique call of the Australian Whip bird in the background as we sip our Café lattes made on Almond milk with a warm slice of homemade gf Ginger Date loaf with real creamy butter melting upon its deliciousness.

I hope you’re feeling a little more relaxed now as we begin our reflection.

Being our own worst enemy!

Recently I have been feeling a little overwhelmed & realized, as I reflected upon this, that it’s coming from feeling pressured!

However, I also realized that it’s not pressure from any outside source but rather pressure from within…myself!

I know, I know how crazy that sounds!

You see I’ve come to know myself fairly well, it goes with the territory of self examination, reflection & debriefing in my professional life & my faith.

And I’ve come to learn something about myself over the years… at times I can be my own worst enemy!

Can you relate here my friend?

Challenging times

If you join me here often you’ll know that I live with several autoimmune conditions, which are rather challenging, especially one being global pain.

Although as a friend recently said,

“Jennifer you make these challenging times seem easy because you look okay.”

Which is great to hear in one sense for I’m determined to live my best life in His strength regardless of my physical limitations & challenges.

But in another sense I also need to be realistic & wise in my capabilities in this season of my life!

Another thing I need to remember is that there’s a grief to chronic disease that we Chronic health warriors constantly battle, which has a habit of creeping up on us & ambushing us if we’re not vigilant.

Grieving over a significant loss in our lives is a part of being human.

And the loss of our health is one such significant loss!

However, not being vigilant in processing the waves of grief as they wash over us can be detrimental to our mental & spiritual health.

Self imposed pressures

Getting back to those self imposed pressures.

You see I would love to be able to spend more time & be a lot more supportive with my family & friends.

That’s the cry of my heart but as I shared in my post Listening most of the time I’m incapable.

So there’s a juxtaposition of emotions & pressures that happen when I see or hear of a need that I struggle to meet.

The pressure of wanting to give support & the actual capacity to do so is at war with each other.

However, I realize that it’s about surrendering these to the Lord. Which has been a continuing learning curve for me in this time of limited capacity.

Wisdom to know the difference

Which brings that prayer of serenity to mind,

Heavenly Father,

Grant me the Serenity

To accept the things I cannot change…

Courage to change the things I can, 

And the Wisdom to know the difference!

It’s all about wisdom, isn’t it! Not my wisdom but God’s wisdom.

Because one important thing that I have learnt…

So many times we jump in thinking we’re doing an amazing job of supporting an individual or individuals going through a difficult situation, when in actual fact we’re getting in God’s way!

For God wants them to seek Him & rely on His strength, provision & guidance for their lives in the situation.

So yes, it’s all about wisdom to know when to support, what level of support to give & when not too!

And there can be a very fine line between these.

So it’s about praying for God’s wisdom, courage & serenity in what He leads…

And sometimes that’s rolling up our sleeves & giving much needed support.

At other times it’s respecting personal boundaries, including God’s boundaries for us & continuing prayer support.

Or doing something within our capacity to do so…like encouragement with its immeasurable blessings.

“Therefore encourage one another, strengthening & building one another up, just as you’re doing. “

1 Thessalonians 5: 11

A simple way to encourage a friend

I’m delighted to introduce you to a dear friend of mine, her name is Heather Dalzell & we’ve known each other nearly a quarter of a century!

Heather has recently started blogging for she has such a heart for those who are seeking to understand God’s Word in it’s simple but powerful message.

Her blog is Light-in-the-darkness & she has some amazing posts. I know she would love you to drop by & leave a word of encouragement as she’s still very new to the blogging world, it’s technology & community.

Yes, it’s all about encouraging one another in whatever capacity we have my friend.

Until next time,


You’re most welcome to join me in The Reading Nook

© 2021 Jennifer M. Ross All Rights Reserved. Photo on 

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18 thoughts on “Are you, your own worst enemy?

  1. Oh, Jennifer…can I EVER relate??? I am my own worst enemy at times too. I put so much unnecessary pressure on myself. Thank you for letting us know about your friend’s blog. I will check it out.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Jennifer, I think we all are our own worse enemy at times. May God give us the wisdom to navigate this journey both for ourselves and for others. And thank you for introducing us to another new blogger and friend 🙂 Heading there now to visit.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Jennifer, this post really resonates with me! Both because I impose pressures on myself all the time and because I jump in to help others without consulting God. I know I have gotten in His way on more than one occasion by doing that! Thank you also for sharing about Heather’s blog; heading there now!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Jennifer, I am my own worst enemy. Thinking I can take care of everyone from my three grandchildren to my 90 year old Dad, I place expectations on myself. I am so grateful I have the health to help, even though I have arthritis. No one but me puts the pressure on me. Thank you for your wise words. I have often intervened in friends’ lives to relieve their pressure, when God was using the pressure to make them more like Himself. Knowing the difference when helping is hurting is not always easy! Blessings sweet friend,

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Jennifer, you are definitely not alone in putting pressure on yourself. I am, as you said, my own worst enemy sometimes as I levy expectations on myself that I wouldn’t ever put on someone else. As you said, we have to surrender things to the Lord and trust Him to give us wisdom. I hope you’re doing well sweet friend. I’m heading over to Heather’s blog now…

    Liked by 1 person

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