Welcome to our time of tea & reflection together my friend!
It’s a beautiful Spring day here on the east coast of Australia, not a cloud in the sky & though it’s a little chilly out, the sunshine is delightful.
I’m having a Lady Grey tea & we have freshly baked gf bacon & cheese muffins, split in two with butter melting upon their deliciousness.
Now we’re seated in the sun with our cuppa & treats, let’s begin our reflection together.
Back in the Day
When I was growing up every Saturday afternoon was ‘Movie time’ with my sister in either going to the Cinema or at home watching a movie on television (TV).
Most of the ones on TV were golden oldies from the 1930s onwards, so they were a mixture of topics.
But there was one Genre that always fascinated me & seemed to have quite a few movies made on the topic over the decades.
And that was the ones searching for the Fountain of Youth, often set in the deep darkest jungles of Africa or South America.
As an adolescent watching these movies I often wondered why on earth adults were so fascinated with finding this ‘Fountain of Youth’ & whether such a thing even existed.
Because to my adolescent mind the most wonderful & beautiful people in my life were my grandparents! And I thought they were perfect just the way they were.
Perception
When I entered University to study for my Degree, many moons ago the first topic covered in Psychology was Perception.
I realised that one person’s perception may not be another’s.
However, I also learnt as I progressed through university & then as a Clinical practitioner that perception is greatly influenced by popular culture & most importantly the family.
Then as a Specialist, specializing in Adolescent & Family therapy I had an alarming & ever increasing number of young adolescents coming to me in serious crisis over their body image.
Now we know that Adolescence is a turbulent time with an acute awareness of the rapid changes in the body. Which is a normal stage of development.
But the rising number of young patients with Dysmorphic ideation or Body Dysmorphic Disorder was alarming.
Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD) is a condition that obsesses upon an area/s of the body with great dissatisfaction or repulsion, it’s a mental health condition.
Please note;
Unless professionally addressed BDD will never be satisfied, no matter what & how many ‘cosmetic procedures’ are performed.
Satisfaction may come momentarily, after a procedure, but eventually will fade or the focus will shift to another area of the body.
When our clinical team met & discussed this alarming trend we realized that there were certain influences impacting today’s adolescents.
The main one is the body beautiful industry which constantly assaults the minds of children & teens with their industry’s version of the “perfect” body image.
This happens not only through all forms of media but also reinforced by peer pressure, popular culture & family influence.
Media & Advertising
I actually wrote about this back in 2019 & called it an epidemic but sadly it has now reached a full blown Pandemic Crisis with 1 in 3 teens & adults ref found with Body Dysmorphic ideation (ideation is one step away from diagnosis of BDD) in westernized countries. This is extremely concerning!
Western Society’s obsession with the ‘body beautiful’ movement is deeply impacting the mental health of our adolescents!
This Crisis is driven by a very greedy & money hungry industry who have no scruples!
Who have set so called new ‘norms’ for what westernised societies should accept as ‘beauty’ that in fact is quite distorted. It is actually stripping away all individuality & uniqueness.
Sadly, this is being normalized throughout popular culture by social media ‘influencers’ that promote this distorted image of beauty.
And by “reality stars” in so called “reality” programs – being highly, highly paid to do so!
Leading many to believe that to have a uniqueness as an individual at any age is just not good enough or even worse, repulsive!
Popular Culture & Family Influence
While we need to question & expose popular culture’s influence on what beauty & body images are being promoted to be, especially when it is hurting our children’s mental health!
We also need to be very aware of our own comments & behaviour about our body’s in front of children in our families, as our comments are deeply, deeply impacting.
Children are listening & absorbing every word we utter,
that’s how they learn to navigate the world around them!
The Solution
We can turn this Crisis around right now within our own families with our children, grandchildren & great grandchildren.
How?
Let’s see what the One who Created us has to say about beauty…that seems to be ignored today;
“Your beauty should not come from outward adornment…
but from the inner disposition of your heart, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit,
which is precious in God’s sight.” I Peter 3: 3-4
For we are,
“…awe inspiringly & wonderfully made!” Psalm 139:14
Therefore, we are beautiful in His sight & that my friend is the true standard of beauty!
We are beautiful to Him just the way we are, wrinkles, wobblies & all! For
‘…gray/white hair is a crown of beauty & glory, if it is found in the way of goodness…’ Proverbs 16:31
So, let’s celebrate our laughter lines, wrinkles & wobblies within our families for we have been gifted amazing bodies that have been wonderfully made by our Heavenly Father!
And the signs of aging? Well my friend they’re actually crowns of beauty & glory, a living testimony for a life well lived for Him! Rejoice!
Until next time,
Jennifer
You’re most welcome to join me in The Reading Nook
Or in Prayer
© 2023 Jennifer M. Ross, teawithjennifer.blog All Rights Reserved. Photo by Markus Winkler on Pexels.com
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Tea With Jennifer 
Jennifer I really appreciate you sharing this important message with Sweet Tea & Friends this month.
Thank yo Paula 😊
Our perspective is so important, isn’t it? I love what you share here, Jennifer. I have always struggled somewhat with my body image, even though my head would tell me it’s silly. I’d love for the next generation to have less of this angst, not more. 😦
Thank you Lisa! And yes our perspective is very important, looking through God’s eyes brings such freedom to our coloured perspective… doesn’t it? Blessings to you sweet friend 😊
Not from outward adornment…what a wise place to begin. Thanks for speaking to this important topic.
You’re most welcome Natalie, so lovely to have you drop by 😊
Jennifer,
This was such a great post. This topic needs to be heard more often. I love the ending to your post where you mention the crowns of beauty and glory, a living testimony of a life well lived for Him! –I needed to read that. Thank you so much for sharing this post at Crazy Little Love Birds link party #6. Always a pleasure having you share with us. 🙂
Thank you Stephanie 😊
Congratulations, your post will be featured on SSPS, on Monday and also on FB Bloggers Share, Care & Inspire as well as Instagram: _esmesalon
Thank you Esme, what a lovely surprise!
I was that bullied, hard on myself ugly body shaming teenager. But I obviously got over it and now in middle age I celebrate my laughter lines, wrinkles & wobblies. I see how aging is honored in Scripture. I’m fearfully & wonderfully made. I figured that I’m made in the image of God and if I cut myself down, I was offending God. And I certainly do not want to do that. I love this message today.
Visiting today from G&T
Thank you Paula, I think many of us have been there in our teens to some extent or another. I like your following statement;
‘I figured that I’m made in the image of God and if I cut myself down, I was offending God’… a sobering thought!
Jennifer, such a beautiful and needed post. I know a number of families who have teens struggling with body image/gender confusion, and it breaks my heart. It seems like, in part, until we have an understanding and belief that we have intrinsic value from God, it’s hard to accept that we have beauty (male or female) in how He has created us.
Thank you Jeanne. Yes, it’s critical & most important to see our real value & worth in God.
Such an important topic, Jennifer. I think identity in our beauty/body is a distraction from our true identity in the One Who made us. When we realize Whose we are, everything else falls into place.
Thank you Lisa. I love your following statement,
“When we realize Whose we are, everything else falls into place.” Amen!
This is such an important message. It’s nearly impossible to meet the industry’s definition of beauty. But the outward will eventually sag and wrinkle no matter what we do. We need the reminder that God’s standards are different.
Thank you Barbara, it’s definitely a very concerning issue. And I agree no matter what, all of us age as time stops for no one…so let’s celebrate God’s standard of beauty in our families & to the world. 😊
Jennifer, beautiful and yes we are both having this conversation which needs to be had. This coming Tuesday I have an interview on the Blog with Melissa Louise Johnson and her book is Soul Deep Beauty: Finding Worth in A World Demanding Flawless.
Thank you Deborah 😊. Sounds like a wonderful interview & book, I’m glad you shared that with us.