It comes to us all…doesn’t it…
Welcome dear friend, it’s time for us to sit & have a cuppa, while we reflect upon some of the more difficult issues in life…
Grab your favorite beverage & treat.
Heartbreak
Heartache, heartwrenching, sadness of heart or heart brokenness are all sadly a part of life on planet earth…
You too may have had your fair share of it my friend.
Maybe it was a lost love or a betrayal from that once special someone.
It may have been the death of your dear loved one or one you didn’t get the chance to show love to…as is part of my story which can be read in Emotional processes …
Whatever the cause of the heartwrenching circumstance, it can be excruciatingly painful!
I remember when my late husband lost his battle with brain cancer, as I wept the night of his passing…
My heart actually physically hurt because I was in such emotional agony in losing my dear sweet gentle husband.
But heartache can also come to us out of concern for others…
We receive the sudden news from a dear friend or family member that they are now facing a life changing situation.

It may be a devastating diagnosis.
It may be a fatal or near fatal accident with life changing injuries.
Or the consequences of unwise choices they or a significant other in their life has made.
It may be a financial issue that will now severely impact their lives…whatever the circumstance…our heart truly aches for them…
Our Reaction to heartwrenching news
This past weekend I received some deeply heartwrenching news from one of my dearest friends whom I have known for over forty years.
Her much loved, nineteen year old, grandson was killed in a car accident.
My first reaction was one of wanting to take this pain from my dear friend, as I have experienced this agonizing pain of a sudden violent death of a loved one.
We lost our son in law through a horrific road accident a few years ago.
I wanted to fix her pain in whatever way possible.
And yes those are noble thoughts but are they the correct ones?
Actually this was the time that I needed to stop reacting & think very carefully!
And be very wise in finding out what type of support that she actually needed in her situation.
My dear friend needed me to just be…as we are both still in lockdown due to the Delta variant in our different regions & can’t physically be with each other.
She needs me…
To be praying for her & her family in what they are now facing.
To be sensitive to her need to act & react to her great loss in whatever way.
To be available for her to share how she is feeling or not feeling.
To be giving her much needed time to herself to grasp, grieve & adjust to this major loss when she needs this time.
Otherwise, I can actually be a hindrance to her in her grief!
Allowing God to do His work
We also need to allow God to do His comforting work through the Holy Spirit in the situation as well, as the following scripture wisely tells us;
“For I will turn their mourning into joy
&
I will comfort them,
&
I will give them joy for their sorrow.”
Jeremiah 31:13b paraphrased
We can offer much needed love, emotional support & care.
Assuring them we are there for them, upholding them in prayer, as they face this absolutely heartwrenching situation.
But it is not our place to take their pain away,
fix it
or
take over the situation for them!
We can offer support in many ways but please, please allow them to have the freedom to either graciously accept or refuse any offer of support without offence being taken, as none would be intended.
Well that brings us to the end of our reflection for today…
I hope this has given you some food for thought when you are faced with heartwrenching news of someone dear to you…
Until next time dear friend…
Jennifer
You’re most welcome to join me in The Reading Nook
Or in Prayer
© 2021 Jennifer M. Ross, teawithjennifer.blog, All Rights Reserved. Photo by Melike Benli on Pexels.com
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My faith in God is the only way I can get through each day! This earth life is so hard at times! Have a lovely weekend.
That it is Kelley, it’s so comforting to know we have a loving God who has promised to never leave us.
Oh, my heart hurts for your friend and for you as you minister to her, Jennifer. 😦 This is indeed devastating news we all dread hearing! I’m thankful your friend has you to understand the pain she is going through as she grieves this loss. May God be a strong presence to her through you and others.
Thank you Lisa, yes it’s definitely devastating. But we do have a comforting God to carry us through. ❤️
Spot on!
Saying a prayer for your friend and her family right now. Your “to be” statements are so wise and practical. Thank you.
Thank you Lauren, your prayers are appreciated ❤️
I’m so sorry for your friend’s devastating news and loss. That’s so true–our first instinct to want to take away pain. But when God allows that pain to come, we need to seek how to minister to that loved one.
Thank you Barbara, yes we need to stop & pray seeking His Will for their situation ❤️
I’m so sorry for the loss of your friend’s grandson, Jennifer! One of my close friend’s husbands recently died of cancer and it is so hard when we just want to take away our friend’s pain. But, as you say, we can’t. We can just be there and be available to listen and support them, trusting that God will be with them and bring them comfort in their grieving.
Thank you Lesley, I’m saddened to hear your friend is going through the loss of her husband too. It’s a terrible pain but loving & supportive friends do help. ❤️
What wise and helpful advice! May God give you wisdom and comfort your friend in this terrible loss.
Thank you Donna. 🙏
Oh Jennifer, your dear friend is blessed to have you walk with her through this valley, slowly, gracefully, gently. I’m praying for you both even as we speak …
Thank you Linda, we appreciate your prayers ❤️
Jennifer, I’m so sorry for your friend’s loss. I wish that you did not know so well what she needs, but I appreciate the hard-earned wisdom that you’ve shared with us. The point about being available so people can share what they are feeling—or not feeling, as the case may be—is so important. When I lost my parents, I was so thankful for friends who simply listened.
Thank you Lois ❤️ Losing your parents has been a huge journey for you & continues to be.💕
Yes, I appreciated the same when I lost my two children, my late husband & our son in law. Having a friend just be there was truly a wonderful blessing.
So sorry to hear about all that has happened. I pray for comfort for her heart and yours. 🙏🏻
It’s good you allowed God be the comfort as much as you wanted to be there for her. 🙂👍🏻
Thank you Herry ❤️