It comes to us all…doesn’t it…
Welcome dear friend, it’s time for us to sit & have a cuppa, while we reflect upon some of the more difficult issues in life…
Grab your favorite beverage & treat.
Heartbreak
Heartache, heartwrenching, sadness of heart or heart brokenness are all sadly a part of life on planet earth…
You too may have had your fair share of it my friend.
Maybe it was a lost love or a betrayal from that once special someone.
It may have been the death of your dear loved one or one you didn’t get the chance to show love to…as is part of my story which can be read in Emotional processes …
Whatever the cause of the heartwrenching circumstance, it can be excruciatingly painful!
I remember when my late husband lost his battle with brain cancer, as I wept the night of his passing…
My heart actually physically hurt because I was in such emotional agony in losing my dear sweet gentle husband.
But heartache can also come to us out of concern for others…
We receive the sudden news from a dear friend or family member that they are now facing a life changing situation.

It may be a devastating diagnosis.
It may be a fatal or near fatal accident with life changing injuries.
Or the consequences of unwise choices they or a significant other in their life has made.
It may be a financial issue that will now severely impact their lives…whatever the circumstance…our heart truly aches for them…
Our Reaction to heartwrenching news
This past weekend I received some deeply heartwrenching news from one of my dearest friends whom I have known for over forty years.
Her much loved, nineteen year old, grandson was killed in a car accident.
My first reaction was one of wanting to take this pain from my dear friend, as I have experienced this agonizing pain of a sudden violent death of a loved one.
We lost our son in law through a horrific road accident a few years ago.
I wanted to fix her pain in whatever way possible.
And yes those are noble thoughts but are they the correct ones?
Actually this was the time that I needed to stop reacting & think very carefully!
And be very wise in finding out what type of support that she actually needed in her situation.
My dear friend needed me to just be…as we are both still in lockdown due to the Delta variant in our different regions & can’t physically be with each other.
She needs me…
To be praying for her & her family in what they are now facing.
To be sensitive to her need to act & react to her great loss in whatever way.
To be available for her to share how she is feeling or not feeling.
To be giving her much needed time to herself to grasp, grieve & adjust to this major loss when she needs this time.
Otherwise, I can actually be a hindrance to her in her grief!
Allowing God to do His work
We also need to allow God to do His comforting work through the Holy Spirit in the situation as well, as the following scripture wisely tells us;
“For I will turn their mourning into joy
&
I will comfort them,
&
I will give them joy for their sorrow.”
Jeremiah 31:13b paraphrased
We can offer much needed love, emotional support & care.
Assuring them we are there for them, upholding them in prayer, as they face this absolutely heartwrenching situation.
But it is not our place to take their pain away,
fix it
or
take over the situation for them!
We can offer support in many ways but please, please allow them to have the freedom to either graciously accept or refuse any offer of support without offence being taken, as none would be intended.
Well that brings us to the end of our reflection for today…
I hope this has given you some food for thought when you are faced with heartwrenching news of someone dear to you…
Until next time dear friend…
Jennifer
You’re most welcome to join me in The Reading Nook
Or in Prayer
© 2021 Jennifer M. Ross, teawithjennifer.blog, All Rights Reserved. Photo by Melike Benli on Pexels.com
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I’m so sorry for your friend’s devastating loss, Jennifer. I’m sorry, too, that you lost your son-in-law some years ago and your daughter her husband. Thank you for all this wise insight and advice. Love and blessings of special strength and peace to you and your friend in this heart wrenching time!
Thank you Trudy ❤️
Jennifer, I am so sorry for your loss. Heart wrenching news is never easy to take no matter how times we may hear it. Thank you for sharing your own feelings and excellent advice for supporting others as they navigate overwhelming grief.
Thank you Donna my heart is hurting for my dear friend & her family ❣️
Ah, yes, Jennifer! Very wise words. We need to not get in the way of grief and muck it up with too many words. Presence in prayer and/or person is the greatest gift we can give💕
Ah, yes, Jennifer! Very wise words. So often we get in the way of grief without intending to muck it up. Presence (in person and/or in prayer) without lots of words can be the greatest gift of care we can offer. 💕
Thank you Pam ❤️
Jennifer, I am so sorry to read of your friend’s loss. It is indeed heartwrenching. Only God can be with her and bring her all she needs – His comfort, His peace, His love. And He will indeed be faithful to her.
Thank you Joanne, yes He is faithful ❤️
I am so sorry for your loss, my friend. It is very difficult to just stand in the gap for others, usually our desire to take away the pain, as you said, To help them feel better quickly, But God is always faithful
Thank you Brenda ❤️
I’m so sorry to hear of your friend’s horrible loss Jennifer. You make such a great point that what people need from us is really just our presence (even if we can’t be there physically). Your reminder that they need to be able to accept or decline offers of help is spot on…. People grieve in different ways and need to be able to do so in the way that’s best for them. Hope you are staying safe and well sweet friend. Blessings to you.
Thank you sweet friend ❤️
Jennifer, I am so sorry of the heart wrenching news from your friend. How great is the grief of a sudden death of a family member, a grandson.
Where do we turn with such pain? The only One who is acquainted with our grief is our comfort. I just prayed for your friend and family.
Sending love and prayers,
Pam ♥️
Thank you sweet friend ❤️
Awwww, I’m so sorry Jennifer. This is good information and reminder that sometimes we just need to be near. Sometimes words are not needed. Love and prayers to you 💔🙏🤗
Thank you Lisa, yes it’s a heartwrenching time.
So sorry to hear this. Your words are a good reminder that we don’t have to try and take their pain away but just be there for them in whatever sense they need us to be.
Thank you Manu…