Welcome to my abode! We are going to have a wonderful time so grab yourself a hot beverage, make yourself comfy & join me…
I have a new tea blend to try today, it’s a fruit tea with Passionfruit, Mango & Orange. My treat is a gf fruit bun, toasted, with real creamery butter melting upon its deliciousness!
Let us begin our time of reflection…
Yesterday, I was asked the following question by a total stranger, “How are you?”
How are you?
Is seen to be a well mannered social greeting in most western societies around the world. Although there may be cultural variations, it boils down to the same basic question being used as a social greeting…well mannered social convention also dictates that we reply!
However, for those of us with chronic health conditions this question is a tricky one to answer.
To give any of the socially acceptable replies of; “Good,” “I’m fine” or “Fine, thank you” is not our physical truth.
Although when this question is used as a social greeting by strangers…they aren’t normally asking how we are feeling…its mainly replacing the social greeting of ‘hello’.
So, while we truly appreciate that the other person is asking either out of social etiquette or real concern. To actually explain how we are physically on any given day is extremely difficult for us.
Let me explain, I have Fibromyalgia which is a chronic pain condition & the added autoimmune conditions of Hashimto’s Thyroiditis & Celiac disease whom all bring their own party mates. And let me tell you…they are inconsiderate little party animals!
Inconsiderate little party animals
You see I think people don’t actually need or want to hear my physical situation nor do I necessarily want to share that I experience pain everyday, all day & the only thing that changes with it, is the intensity.
However, I am doing my absolute best life that I can possibly do, within these challenging conditions… For I am determined that these conditions will not control my life!
So the answer to yesterday’s greeting, “How are you?” I replied with my favorite answer “Great spiritually, thank you!”
Meaning ~ I’m totally doing my best life within the challenges of Fibromyalgia & chronic pain! I am still Jennifer, I can still be who I am, who I have always been…
Though I may have had to significantly rearrange the way I do my life, I am still growing & learning, traveling on this great spiritual adventure!
Please don’t misunderstand me here, in that reply I am not stating that I think I’m a spiritual great. Rather I am stating that I am traveling well within my spirit. I’m deliberately choosing to focus upon the positive in my life. Therefore…
“...I will run with endurance the marathon that is set before me, fixing my eyes on the great pacer, Jesus, who is my faith & hope…”
Paraphase of Hebrews 12: 1-2
Those of us who have chronic health conditions are running the marathon of our lives, granted it may be at a snail’s pace with lots of rest stops along the way but a marathon none the less!
Running to the upward goal
I also realize you too dear friend are running your own marathon, the marathon of Life. It may be in the area of your health, marriage, relationship, parenting, your own mental health or that of a loved one, grief, singleness, spirituality, emotional struggles, life with a special needs child or with work.
Did you know that it is extremely wise on these long distance marathons to have a pacer.
A marathon pacer is: one who comes alongside the marathon runner, the runner then follows the pacer falling into his step & timing, to ensure they are running at their correct capacity. A good pacer is very aware of his follower’s personal capacity to help them reach the desired goal.
In my chronic health marathon, I have the most amazing pacer, who has come alongside me intimately knowing my personal capacity. He is consistent in His support, He never tires or grows weary but is always there alongside me, strengthening & encouraging…I know I will reach the finish line with Him pacing beside me!
Let me ask you the following question to ponder…Are you in step with the great Pacer in your marathon? Or have you lost sight or maybe didn’t know that the Pacer could help you go the distance & are trying to go it alone? You may enjoy reading Challenging days…really!
Well my new tea blend tasted a little bitter for my palate, may need to add a little honey next time but the fruit bun was absolutely delicious!
Until next time…
Jennifer
You’re most welcome to join me in The Reading Nook
© 2019 Jennifer M. Ross, teawithjennifer.blog All Rights Reserved. Photo on Pexels.com
Blog link ups & featured at classy-flamingos-blog-party
A lot of food for thought Jennifer. It is difficult knowing how much to share with others when they ask that all important question. I love the idea of your pacer. I just need to listen to him more at times!
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Thank you Brigid, it is definitely a quandary in knowing what to share in chronic health issues…or not…
Listening to the Pacer is always a great idea 😉
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Hi Jennifer! Knowing the One who will always walk beside me and yes be my pacer makes me know that I can always trust Him in every situation. I am so sorry you deal with chronic pain, I now have a little arthritis in my hands that can be uncomfortable at times. But He giveth more Grace! Thank you for always encouraging and inspiring❤️
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He does giveth more grace Pam…arthritis can be very painful indeed. Sorry to hear you suffer from that. ♥
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You have to know that you would get my attention with this title! 🙂 Thank you for the information about fibromyalgia and chronic pain. I think spreading the knowledge like this increases empathy and that’s a wonderful thing.
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You inspired the title Laurie! 😀
I did have another one but thought people wouldn’t know what it meant.
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I appreciate the handful of people who know my deep struggles. It allows me to say I am “fine” to everyone else without feeling I am shortchanging myself.
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Yes, those precious ones in our lives that love us in our struggles are treasures.
A late reply as we had some family emergencies again, they seem to be pouring in lately… But God is blessing us in them 😀
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The emergencies never seem to come singly but always in bunches. Peace to you all.
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Thank you Elizabeth…it does seem to be like that.
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Good read! Loved it! And sipped it w blueberry slimming tea here!! Lol. ☕️🙌💯❤️
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Lovely to have you drop by Ricky, I’m glad you enjoyed our tea time together with your delicious blueberry tea! 😀
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What a great answer to an often difficult question to answer for those of who don’t feel great regularly. Hoping today is kind to you🌸
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Thank you Mishka, I hope your day is full of warm sunshine in your Spring 😀
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Having a cup of mint tea while reading. I felt like I was reading thoughts that sometimes go through my own head when folks ask me “how are you?”. I really like your answer. I hope those who don’t suffer Chronic illness like we do can read and understand a bit more than they do. Thanks for sharing!
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Yes, bringing awareness of what it’s like living with chronic disease to nurture understanding is my hope.
Lovely having you drop by & peppermint tea is both relaxing & refreshing in one cupful…Don’t you think… 😉
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That’s a great way of answering the question, and I love your positive attitude that keeps you going!
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Thank you Lesley 😀
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Oh the loaded “How are you doing?” which at times even with those that do know me, I still tend to not want to answer even when I know they want the honest one. I too have Fibro and celiac plus a couple more and I am so thankful the one that knows it ALL is the One that walks beside me each step of each day. I live by His strength. I really like your answer “I’m spiritually good” that’s awesome!! #inspirememonday linkup
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Thank you! Yes April, I am very grateful that He walks alongside me too!
It appears we have a few things in common with our health…hoping you have a better day today 😉
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I can definitely relate to holding back on the ‘how are you?’ question. I have something called Fabry disease, which affects my energy and pain levels, and I actually prefer that people don’t ask me how I feel all the time. I don’t like where it puts me mentally.
As for the standard greeting where people ask you how you’re feeling/doing as a ‘hello,’ I must say it’d be nice if we just said what we really mean. Oh, no! I think I’ve found one of my buttons. 😉
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I’m saddened to hear you have a chronic health condition too. The greeting is definitely a loaded question for us…but lovely having you drop by 😀
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Jennifer, I’m so glad I serendipitously found your blog! I love the depth of your writing and the clarity you give towards describing your daily chronic pain. I can’t say I’m in your shoes, I have my own little journey I’m meandering through, but if I could, I would love to wave a magic wand and remove all your pain.
That said, you’re right, while your body may be physically struggling, the strength of your spirituality is quite evident. You have my utmost respect and I will definitely be following you!
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Lovely to meet you & glad you dropped by! Our journey’s though difficult at times always have an amazing destination…
It will be lovely to have you join me on this journey.
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I love the powerful message in this post. Especially the metaphor on the great Pacer.
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Thank you Cameron, lovely to have you drop by 😀
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What a wonderful post Jennifer! I especially loved where you wrote, “Those of us who have chronic health conditions are running the marathon of our lives, granted it may be at a snail’s pace with lots of rest stops along the way but a marathon none the less!” and detailed the need for a pacer. I’m so grateful to have Him by my side as I run this marathon also. Thanks for sharing such beautiful words of hope.
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It’s a delight to share Terri, thank you for your kind words & the link up 😀
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