Feeling alone…

Loneliness can be felt by any one of us, at any time & in the most surprising of settings…

Welcome dear friend, come & sit with me for awhile as we reflect upon this strange emotion….while sipping our cuppas together…

I have prepared a hot cup of Creme Brulee tea, which is absolutely delicious & have a few slices of the most deliciously moist gf fruit cake ready…specially baked for me by an old friend…

In the years I spent as a mental health professional I came across many people who felt alone, lonely or immersed in the feelings of loneliness within the situations that were impacting their lives.

I’m sure most of us can relate to this emotion at some point in our life…So what is this thing called loneliness that can come to anyone of us?

The dictionaries define it generally as;

“Solitary, isolated, unfrequented, sad because of being companionless.”

However I believe this definition is a little too simplistic…

There are many ways in feeling alone or lonely & they are not necessarily in being  isolated, solitary or companionless.

Let me personalize this for you;

There was a time in my life many years ago, before I was a registered Therapist,  when I went through a very difficult situation with a significant Other in my life…

I can remember within that time being at a social event, surrounded by the people I knew & loved…yet feeling very much alone…actually the loneliest I had ever felt in my entire life.

In other words loneliness is a state of mind…it isolates us within our own thoughts, feelings & emotions…

During that time I felt I could not share the situation with those who cared…I was already totally overwhelmed & could not deal with the emotions of others that I knew sharing would evoke.

But through that time a new growth in my faith occurred, as I knew deep down that I was not spiritually alone as the God of the universe had promised;

“I will never leave you, nor will I ever forsake you, so that we can confidently say, the Lord is my Helper, I will…[be brave]” 

Hebrews 13:5-6

Trusting in the above promise gave me courage…I sought God’s guidance & direction for the situation through much prayer & fasting…as the circumstance had become intolerable & was about to break me!

A major change was needed, something had to totally change for healing to begin!

God answered my prayers, a major change did occur...but it was not in this significant Other…It was in me!

I came to realize, through God’s Word, pastoral advice & circumstances that our Heavenly Father does not expect us to be in a situation that is dangerous & toxic to our wellbeing…

I also came to realize that the patterns of behavior that had been & were being acted out, solely belonged to this Other. For I had gone above & beyond, time & time again in my love & support for them throughout the years but they had refused to acknowledge & accept either.

And finally, I realized...

We can’t help those who don’t want help or acknowledge their need for help…Only God can…if they so allow Him!

But we can take all the necessary steps to protect our own heart, body, mind & spirit from their destructive behavior directed toward us, that greatly impacts our life & the lives we are responsible for…

“ Guard your heart [dear ones] for it is a wellspring of life…” 

Proverbs 4:23

So, dear friend…Let me assure you that whatever situation you are facing you are not alone…As there is a mighty Heavenly Father who deeply loves & cares for you…even when your thoughts, feelings & emotions may try to convince you otherwise!

Until next time…

Jennifer

 

Jennifer is a published author, discover more in The Book Nook

 

 

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