Welcome! Today I thought we would reflect upon why some relationships seem to last for a season while others a lifetime.
But first let’s grab our cuppa’s, a treat & get comfy. I have a new mug today given to me as a gift for my recent birthday with photos of my family encircling its outer surface & a Creme Brulee tea within to sip upon.
If you joined me here last week you’ll know that my Word of the Year (WOTY) for 2024 is Change. Which had me pondering about the relationships that have come & gone in my life, especially after looking through some old photos recently.
Understanding Relationships
I came across the following poem quite a few years ago, the author is unknown but you may be familiar with it;
“When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed.
They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually…
They are there for the reason… Then, without any wrongdoing on your part, or at an inconvenient time…the relationship ends.
Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.
What we must realize is that the need has been met… The prayer you sent up has been answered. And now it is time to move on.
Then others come into your life for a SEASON, Because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn.
They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never known.
They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy…But, only for a season.
Then… LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons – things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation.
Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person, and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.” – Author unknown
While I think this poem has some merit, I think it misses some very important truths.
But, if we look at it through a different lens we can see those truths.
Reason
When we’re placed in a person’s life we are there because God has placed us there for His purpose.
The main Reason is to love them with God’s love. That love may take the form of support, encouragement, friendship or a simple listening ear (as a Clinical Counsellor I had many such professional relationships).
It may be to share how God carried you through a difficult experience in your life & to walk alongside them through a similar experience.
Or it may be to allow God to prepare you for the journey ahead through their shared experience as in Tea & Tigers in the Highlands of Malaysia…
Season
The relationship may last for a long or short period. Then for whatever reason & often in God’s timing, the season for that relationship will come to its end. For it was only for that specific season.
Let’s make this personal…
Having moved extensively over my lifetime, I can think of many such relationships. Some were for many years but are no longer, while others only for a short period of time.
And some of the dearest relationships suddenly ended because those dear people were promoted to Heaven as shared in Penang, Pearls of the Orient.
Lifetime
And then there are those relationships you think are going to last a lifetime but sadly do not. Once again it was for only a season to love God’s love for the reason He had purposed.
And if they rejected your love, we just need to bless them & let them go, leaving them in God’s care. For to cling to that relationship will only bind us to that hurt & rejection.
Then there are those beautiful relationships that do last what seems to be a lifetime, although as we are all still living we can never be assured just how long a person will be in our life or we theirs.
For life circumstances have a habit of changing, at times quite suddenly & unexpectedly.
For a lifetime & beyond…
However, there is one relationship that we can be absolutely assured that will last not only for our lifetime but for eternity & that relationship is with our Heavenly Father through His Son Jesus.
…for He Himself has said, “I WILL NEVER DESERT YOU,
NOR WILL I FORSAKE or LET YOU DOWN or
RELAX MY HOLD ON YOU, Assuredly Not!”
Hebrews 13:5
I have been in this relationship for well over four decades & can say without a doubt that God through His Spirit has kept His promise without wavering.
Through all the ups & downs that have presented themselves to me, He has been there when no one else could & life with Him is the most wonderful adventure. You can read part of my story HERE.
Do you know this relationship my friend?
If not, then I invite you to join me in Prayer.
Until next time,
Jennifer
You’re also welcome to join me in My Story
© 2024 Jennifer M. Ross, teawithjennifer.blog All Rights Reserved. Photo by Sindre Stru00f8m on Pexels.com
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Jennifer, your post is wonderful. It reminded me that sometimes we must let go of relationships that become burdens rather than blessings. However, I have also learned so much from the people who have come into my life. Even if I had to say goodbye or just walk away, there was a reason for their presence. Thank you for sharing this post. It will be featured tomorrow at The Crazy Little Love Birds party.
Thank you Stephanie! Yes, each relationship gives many lessons & hopefully leaves us a little wiser for the encounter.
How lovely to be featured, thank you! ☺️
Such great advice, Jennifer. I have lost important relationships in the last few years, and one very important one this past year. It is important to understand the nature of grief in these circumstances.
I’m saddened to hear that Donna. Sendng you a heart hug my friend.
Yes, I agree it’s very important to understand the grief that goes with lost relationships & how long that grief can last.
Thank you for your encouaging words sweet friend.
Oh it’s so hard to be left behind … I’ve struggled with letting go and moving ahead. I find in recent months that relationships that faded away decades ago are slowly being re-kindled. And that makes me happy.
That is lovely to hear Linda, how wondeful! Thank you for sharing that with us 😊
It is never easy for me when a relationship changes. I am so grateful there is One who never changes and will remain with me until the end. There truly is no friend like Jesus, who sticks closer than a brother. Your words always bring encouragement and a comfort!
Thank you Joanne. ☺️ Yes, it’s not easy to see the end of a season in a relationship, but I’m glad that’s not the case with our relationship with Jesus ❤️
Blessings 🙏
Blessings to you too! ☺️
Such an important post for me, Jennifer. I’ve lost some very significant relationships over the past two years that I still grieve. I have to constantly find the higher ground in my thoughts about them so as not to get trapped in negative thoughts. You’ve helped me here today. Thank you, friend. Change is a wonderful word of the year!
You’re most welcome Lisa. I’m saddened to hear that your going through such losses, that is a difficult journey. Sending you hugs.
So true and well said. The longer we live the more we experience all these aspects of relationship. There is no question that there is one forever relationship and that is only with Christ who loves us best in every season.
Thank you Pam, so lovely to have you drop by sweet friend! How is your mouth going now?
I have one friend who I met in Kindergarten, back in 1950–over 73 years ago–and we are still friends, though mostly long-distance as we live in different cities. Nothing seems to change the friendship even when we do not connect for months on end. I have known friendship with Jesus since 1970–more than 50 years. I have had other friendships end in death–too many of them. I have had others end slowly and almost imperceptibly as we move into different phases of life. Some have ended abruptly, a surprise to me, but I have learned to let them go when I have no idea what their issues were. But, as you said, Jennifer, the most important and lasting friendship should be with Jesus as it will never end as long as I continue to walk with Him.
Wow Diane that is an amazingly long friendship! How wonderful!
Yes I agree, some relationships just slowly fade. Thank you for sharing & joining me in a cuppa today my friend. 😊
It can be emotionally devastating when a relationship that we thought would yield a forever friend ends. Sometimes there are warning signs that the realtiionship is not healthy. Sadly, sometimes we are blindsided. The most important thing to remember is that God knows who and wat we need in our lives and we have to but ask for His provisoin.
Yes, l agree Barb. Another devastating blow is when a marriage relationship ends, that was supposed to last a lifetime…
I love you’re following statement;
“The most important thing to remember is that God knows who and what we need in our lives and we have to but ask for His provision.” Amen!
I have certainly experienced friendships for a reason, season, and lifetime. I have lost many friends through death. Friendships require work for both people involved. I have been blessed with friendships for more than 40 + years! There is no friend like Jesus!
Thank you Pam. Isn’t it wonderful when sweet friendships continue into their fifth decade? Yes, there is no friend or Saviour like Jesus! ☺️ Blessings to you sweet friend 💕