Home sweet home

I heard a noise at the front door of the homestead, I opened the door & sitting on the welcome mat were my pet cat Bobbie, a Russian Blue & my working dog, an Australian Kelpie, Polly…

Welcome my friend, how lovely to have you drop by for our time of tea & reflection.

I’m reminiscing today…

We have traveled back in time to 2002

Where I have prepared an Australian Afternoon tea blend, its a strong black tea, which I water down with extra boiling water, as its a little too robust for my palate & delicious Gf Lamingtons.

We are sitting on the side verandah of my homestead with the sun warming us in our comfy chairs & a small table, recycled from tractor parts, nestled between us.

We are looking out over the paddocks down to the creek that weaves across the front of our property, birds are singing & sheep are bleating.

The Present….

Around this time each year, I become a lot quieter & reflective then normal, this is a subconscious behaviour & it’s only when my hubby asks if I’m okay, do I realize its that time again…

When my sweet gentle late husband was diagnosed on April 30, 2002 with brain cancer (Glioblastoma Multiforme Grade 4 ~ was the clinical term).

We only had 12 weeks together after that diagnosis to his final passing in August, 2002.

You see our subconscious minds keep a memory of traumatic events, which quite often precede our conscious memories.

This has an indelible effect upon our emotions & on our behavior.

cat-pet-animal-domestic-104827.jpeg

Back to Bobbie & Polly on the doorstep

Bobbie had been rather naughty & had stayed out all night.

Polly being part of the family decides to have her say in the situation by barking her ‘talking bark’ which is quite hilarious!

They have a love hate relationship these pets of mine, each morning they lovingly greet each other than have spats for the rest of the day!

My thoughts now wander to when my late husband had passed away a few months earlier & I’m now living alone in our rural Homestead set on 800 acres of a working farm.

My stepson & I have reduced the stock to 800 head of fine merino sheep from 1200 & are debating over a cuppa, on this same verandah, as to whether to sow this year’s crops.

We are at the beginning of a major drought

That unbeknownst to us, would last for years. Although we are already hand feeding sheep each morning, from our grain storage & Lucerne hay stores.

We” are my late husband’s eldest son & I, it has been a traumatic & devastating few months, we are still coming to terms, each in our own way, with this death.

He the death of his Dad & me the death of my beloved husband & work mate!

While it was comforting to be in the home that we had created together & to go out to work the farm each day having my pets as little companions.

Polly beside me working the sheep & Bobbie to greet me when I came home.

There came the time when change would inevitably happen & a new home would become a place of sanctuary for a different season in my life… Shared in Tea by the sea…

Loss & grief, healing & wholeness are a part of life.

But the main thing is how we handle these events in our lives for our continuing wellbeing!

I handle mine with God, as it’s in His strength, comfort & healing that I find solace… Shared in Mending brokenness…

Please Note;

We don’t actually get over the loss of a loved one but we can come to that place of acceptance to move forward in life.

It’s okay to remember our loved one’s & enjoy the happy memories we had with them.

Being kind to ourselves when the sad memories come.

For they will surely arise especially at significant times like anniversaries.

That’s just a part of being human & what we have been created to be…emotional beings!

Well I hope you enjoyed our tea time & Lamingtons.

Thank you for journeying with me back to a difficult time in my life that is now remembered with fondness.

I truly appreciated your company.

If my story has triggered memories for you of your loved one who has passed, enjoy the happy memories & be kind to yourself in the sadder ones…

However, if your life is being significantly impacted by grief, to the point where you can’t maintain your normal life. Then please seek professional help as soon as possible.

For God’s help also comes through others.

Until next time,

Jennifer

 You’re most welcome to join me in The Reading Nook

Or 

In Prayer


© Jennifer M. Ross, 2018, teawithjennifer.blog All rights reserved. Photo by Pexels.com

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39 thoughts on “Home sweet home

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  1. I lost my son on June 6, 2017. This is a time for me, also, to become quietly reflective. My wish for everyone who has lost someone they love is that the memories bring more smiles than tears.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Yes, it can be all consuming especially in the early days but the waves of grief get futher & further apart as time goes by & especially when we move into acceptance.
      Your blueberry muffin sounds delicious!

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Michele. I do have a peace, God’s peace & I do long to spend eternity with Him…. but will continue to be His child, loving & serving where He directs until that day.
      It was a beautiful sanctuary…

      Liked by 1 person

  2. The only reason I knew what Lamingtons are is because I watched Zumbo’s Just Desserts on Netflix ;). Now that we have that connection established, your homestead sounds wonderful. April is a tough month for me because that’s when my husband received a non-Hodgkin’s Lymphoma diagnosis (despite a rather traumatic journey, God healed him), and the month our daughter got out of the psych ward and came home to continue healing. But God is good, all the time. He has helped me recover from both of those events!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Praise Him! You have had a difficult journey Anita but you are now bringing such encouragement to others through the healing blessings that God has given to you through those times.
      What an amazing testimony you have!

      Like

  3. A lovely remembrance. I lost my first husband when I was thirty-two. I coped with my grief by writing letters to him in heaven. Now all these years later, I write books for children. I have been blessed because along the way I met my current husband and love of my life, and we have a beautiful daughter. God has been good to me :0)

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I love the tenderness of this post. It’s precious to see where you were and how you journey through with the blessings that God provided. A son, pets, some comforting tea, and His presence. And persistence!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I am just catching up on posts from being away. This one touched me. Today I was behind a couple at the grocery store. The wife was following her husband by watching his feet move forward as he shopped. Clearly she had dementia, but could still walk. Occasionally he stopped and reassured her. They were my age and I was struck by the challenges so many face with quiet courage and steady commitment.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Jennifer – what a beautiful peace to keep the memory alive on a sweet note, and I understand why you would get contemplative and quiet around the same time each year. So, do you still live on the 800-acre farm? Do you still Have all the crops and livestock too? Thanks for linking up and stopping by over at #TuneInThursday today

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Thank you for sharing and allowing us into your life. It helps to understand those that are grieving. I am sorry for your pain and glad the happy memories bring a smile to your face. Maree

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You’re welcome Maree,
      I know it is important to share our journeys so others may gain understanding & comfort through those whom have gone through the experience of grief.

      Like

  8. Jennifer – I enjoyed the tea, however robust. I needed a good strong cuppa this afternoon. I so understand the remembering – those times leave imprints on our souls. I just wrote about that the other day. I love the way you draw us in with tea and cookies and extremely well-written words. xo

    Liked by 1 person

  9. What a bittersweet time of year this must be for you, Jennifer. This post reflects the peace you have in your heart, but the grief and loss are there too. Blessings to you, dear friend. God is with you now and always!

    Liked by 1 person

  10. What a lovely blog you have here! I got here through Remember Me Monday…you are the link before me. I, too, wrote about a loved one who has gone on to Jesus. While thoughts of them may make us melancholy at certain times, those memories keep them alive as well. Oh, thank God for the promise of Heaven and eternal life with our loved ones.

    Blelssings,
    Patti @ Clothed with Joy

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you & lovely having you join me here Patti! So glad you enjoyed our time together. Yes, praise God for His assurance of seeing our loved ones who knew Him as their Lord & Savior, who are now enjoying His presence that we will see them again one day!
      You may enjoy reading my heaven experience HERE
      Blessings to you too:-D

      Like

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